Let's face it; I'm not really made to be frugal. However, in today's society, frugality can be a necessity. So, I try. I have saved money using cloth diapers, making my own baby food and home-cooked meals without going to the grocery store; I gave up clothes shopping for Lent (probably my greatest Lenten sacrifice to date)...I'm making a real effort at not spending money.
The difficult thing is that I have wants. They're not needs. They're not, "I can't survive without it" or "That will make work so much easier." No, they are wants...I want what others around me have. I want the nicer car, the exotic travel, the ease of life that seems to come if I just get that newer gadget...you get the idea. These are all a part of the "I see - I need" syndrome which I have to resist on an hourly basis.
It's not easy to resist these urges. I am the person that marketing departments are trying to get when they put items in the checkout lane or sale signs on windows. I am the person you invite to your at-home candle/basket/housewares/food party. These things call out to me. I can feel that inner desire to go in, find any item, and buy it. But, I'm not made of money; therefore, I must resist.
So, how do I do it? Well, it's one minute at a time - sometimes even one second at a time. I try to stay away from areas where I'll spend money. But, you can't do this forever. I would have to stay locked away to truly avoid spending money.
I am not perfect. I stumble weekly. Then, I pick myself up and start again. I'm making progress. I have set goals of things that I would like to have in my life. I've planned my dream vacation to Europe. I've priced it. Now, I'm saving for it. It may never come. With each stumble I have, I fall further away from it. But, with each purchase I avoid, I get closer to it...eventually my avoidance will bring me closer to my goal. Until I reach it, I'll try to continue resisting - one second at a time.
How do you resist the "I see - I need" urge?
Monday, March 21, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Transitions
Transition is always difficult. Whether it's moving to a new home, changing jobs, changing relationship statuses...there are always obstacles to overcome and challenges to face.
The same is true for transitions in my Sweet Pea. The periods of transitions are the toughest for us. First, it was transitioning from in the womb to in my arms. After all, she had to learn to breathe on her own, nurse, sleep during the night and stay awake during daytime - not to mention allowing all of her body systems to function. That's one tough job for someone so tiny. The next major transition was to eating solid foods. She had to learn tastes, textures, swallowing while getting rid of the tongue thrust reflex. Other transitions are to moving her own body via crawling or walking, talking and communicating, playing on her own or entertaining herself. The list goes on and on and on.
While these periods of change have included many sleepless nights on my part, they have - as I look back - been relatively short. And, best of all, these times have passed.
So, for those of you in the midst of whatever period of transition, know this...these times will pass. Before you know it, you'll look back and wonder where the time has gone!
The same is true for transitions in my Sweet Pea. The periods of transitions are the toughest for us. First, it was transitioning from in the womb to in my arms. After all, she had to learn to breathe on her own, nurse, sleep during the night and stay awake during daytime - not to mention allowing all of her body systems to function. That's one tough job for someone so tiny. The next major transition was to eating solid foods. She had to learn tastes, textures, swallowing while getting rid of the tongue thrust reflex. Other transitions are to moving her own body via crawling or walking, talking and communicating, playing on her own or entertaining herself. The list goes on and on and on.
While these periods of change have included many sleepless nights on my part, they have - as I look back - been relatively short. And, best of all, these times have passed.
So, for those of you in the midst of whatever period of transition, know this...these times will pass. Before you know it, you'll look back and wonder where the time has gone!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
There's Hope For Me Yet!
This past week, I was blessed to be able to listen to a fabulous presenter, Will Parnell, Director of the Helen Gordon Child Development Center at Portland State University. During his talk, he discussed how we, as adults, can look at our children not as children of needs, but children of rights. With this approach, we can actively listen to our children and involve them in society instead of assuming that they are helpless and are in constant need of our assistance. Even at a very young age, children have possibilities. We just have to listen to them - even when they can't speak for themselves.
As a mom, there are days that go by when I wonder where the hope is for me. My Sweet Pea is either not sleeping well, not eating well, not building her vocabulary, not crawling, not walking...you get the point: she's not doing what I see other kids her age doing. I know, I know...every child develops at a different rate. You hear this over and over from other parents, relatives, friends, doctors, nurses, etc. But, does any mom really truly believe this? We try to tell ourselves that we do - or at least I did. However, in the back of my mind, there was always that lingering question, "What am I doing wrong?" I didn't think that my child could tell me the answer to this question...after all, she has very few words she can say.
Well, today, I am here to say that there is hope for me yet! Earlier this month, we celebrated Sweet Pea's first birthday. It's hard to believe that one year has already passed. The days may go by slowly, but the year sped past. And, I can't believe all that's happened. I won't name everything she can do now...then I may start lamenting about what she still can't do. However, I look at how far we've come and how her little personality is now surpassed where I ever thought it would take us in a year. Each day may seem slow, but during those days, she's been observing, learning, and taking everything in. It may have taken her a bit longer to get to some places than other kids, but she's getting there in her own time (just as during labor!). She is overcoming obstacles. And, the best part is, I see her enjoying each and every thing she encounters. I just had to actively listen to her to realize all of this.
My child has shown me through her play, her expressions, her body language, her laughter, her cries, her temper tantrums, and so much more that I am not doing things wrong. No, this is not the answer to that lingering question. The answer is quite the opposite...I'm doing things right!! I just need to realize that growth and development take time. These things do not always occur overnight - at least not in the way that I often hope. Just as it took time for my child to develop within my womb, it now takes time for her to develop outside of it.
So, to all of you moms who may have this same question lingering within your mind. Take heart, there is hope for all of us yet! We just need to listen with more than our ears!
As a mom, there are days that go by when I wonder where the hope is for me. My Sweet Pea is either not sleeping well, not eating well, not building her vocabulary, not crawling, not walking...you get the point: she's not doing what I see other kids her age doing. I know, I know...every child develops at a different rate. You hear this over and over from other parents, relatives, friends, doctors, nurses, etc. But, does any mom really truly believe this? We try to tell ourselves that we do - or at least I did. However, in the back of my mind, there was always that lingering question, "What am I doing wrong?" I didn't think that my child could tell me the answer to this question...after all, she has very few words she can say.
Well, today, I am here to say that there is hope for me yet! Earlier this month, we celebrated Sweet Pea's first birthday. It's hard to believe that one year has already passed. The days may go by slowly, but the year sped past. And, I can't believe all that's happened. I won't name everything she can do now...then I may start lamenting about what she still can't do. However, I look at how far we've come and how her little personality is now surpassed where I ever thought it would take us in a year. Each day may seem slow, but during those days, she's been observing, learning, and taking everything in. It may have taken her a bit longer to get to some places than other kids, but she's getting there in her own time (just as during labor!). She is overcoming obstacles. And, the best part is, I see her enjoying each and every thing she encounters. I just had to actively listen to her to realize all of this.
My child has shown me through her play, her expressions, her body language, her laughter, her cries, her temper tantrums, and so much more that I am not doing things wrong. No, this is not the answer to that lingering question. The answer is quite the opposite...I'm doing things right!! I just need to realize that growth and development take time. These things do not always occur overnight - at least not in the way that I often hope. Just as it took time for my child to develop within my womb, it now takes time for her to develop outside of it.
So, to all of you moms who may have this same question lingering within your mind. Take heart, there is hope for all of us yet! We just need to listen with more than our ears!
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